Messi makes Argentina magnificent, Nigeria to face France in knockout

On day 14 of the World Cup we learned that Argentina + Messi = very good, Nigeria will face France in the knockout, Porto Alegre police are a bit too keen, Brazilians may not love Argentines and deadpan Queiroz is quitting Iran.

Nigerian goalkeeper Vincent Enyeama takes on Argentina's Lionel Messi Reuters/Stefano Rellandini

The boy Messi done good. Argentina are quite a good team without Lionel Messi. With him they’re very good. He doesn’t hog the ball and the limelight. He gives ace passes and lets other people look brilliant. But the Argentina v Nigeria game will be

remembered for Messi’s brace rather than Ahmed Musa’s mainly because Argentina won and Lionel Messi genius is an easier headline. Messi poached Argentina’s first goal and the second was a sumptuous free kick. The second was significant because it followed a couple of fouls on Messi and his fellows just outside the box. The warning has gone out.

And then there was one. On day 13 Côte d’Ivoire got very close to reaching the last 16 for the first time. But they were undone by a controversial last-minute penalty. So Nigeria restored African honour by advancing to the knockout stages. The Nigerians are there for the first time since 1998. And they play in the capital Brasilia on Monday for the chance to equal Ghana’s achievement at the 2010 World Cup in South Africa. Nigeria will be next up against France who churned out a 0-0 draw with Ecuador. Should be intriguing.

It’s a police state in Porto Alegre. Imagine our surprise when we’re asked for two forms of identity by a police officer on our way to cover the match between Argentina and Nigeria. Presumably because Nigeria v Argentina is considered a high-security match. But it’s not fair. The fans approaching the stadium are asked to show a ticket and a passport. All we had was a big glaring Fifa accreditation badge. This wasn’t good enough for Senhor Overly Zealous. We showed him a French press card with our smiling face and he seemed happy with that. Lucky that we had it in our wallet. Un peu too much, we think.

Maybe the Brazilians don’t like Argentines. Could it be true? Do the Argentina supporters sing songs about coming into the house and taking the cup? No? Really? Oh, our South American cousins, they’re so boisterous. But what’s this? Arriving tired and bedraggled from Belo Horizonte, we checked in at the hotel in Porto Alegre and the receptionist – Brazilian – told us straight up she’d be supporting Nigeria.
Just give us our key, we’ll deal with bigotry in the morning. And we certainly did. Thank you Mr Police Officer.

You can love the players and love the fans … but they don’t pay the bills. In not so many words Carlos Queiroz has quit as manager of the Iran national side. It’s all been too much for me, he said, in an emotional press conference following Iran’s 3-1 loss to Bosnia. Queiroz reminds me of a skit in an annual published ages ago by a wacky British comedy group called The Goodies. It had three pictures of the actor Charles Bronson. One showed Bronson’s face angry; another portrayed it as sad and the third as happy. It was the same picture. Queiroz appears that way. Scathing, sarcastic or solemn, neither his features nor his intonation ever change. Maybe it’s different when he speaks his native Portuguese. Anyway Queiroz looks like he’s breaking for the border. The football federation, he says, doesn’t seem to want him. Executives have made no approaches to extend his contract. However Iran, the country and the people, will remain forever in his heart. Ah, bless! Sentimental? Same face.

The past is not a forgotten land. A long time ago just before the daily review decided to sully the world of journalism, we had a job at the London Tourist Board. It involved helping people get around London. Minimum requirement to fulfil this function was three languages. Being fresh out of university, our French and German were shiny bright. We came into contact with others equally or even more well endowed. We often worked with a girl called Simona whose parents were Italian and listening to her direct people to Victoria coach station, we picked up that bit of Italian. One day we dealt with a couple of inquiries in German and French. Then an Italian tourist asked for the way to the coach station and we were able to help. Next up came a lady who asked, “Is your English as impressive?” We raised an eyebrow suavely and helped her. Thirty-odd years later we were able to employ the line while trying to get an extra pass for the mixed zone where players and journalists mingle after a match. Before the Argentina-Nigeria game a woman in the office where the passes are dished out was helping an Argentine journalist (in Spanish) and then a Brazilian photographer (in Portuguese). We were next up. It would have been wrong not to. She blushed and smiled. Pass.